Tuesday, May 30, 2006

About Me - Best Qualities

I think some of my best qualities are my intangibles.

Friday, May 26, 2006

Smokes, Cocaine, And Other Sunday School Topics

There is a certain method that some parents use when they find their children with cigarrettes. The parents make the offending child smoke the whole pack at once or buy them a carton and make them smoke the whole thing. This of course makes them very sick, and their brains connect smoking with this sickness. From then on, through association the brain will not want them to smoke, and if they do it will be very unpleasant. The brain is cool that way.

That being said, I think it would be a really bad idea to make your children snort a ton of cocaine if you caught them with some. You shouldn't put down like 100 lines and say, "Now you snort every last one of these right now!" I mean, sure, it's creative, and yes, you would teach them a lesson, but that's a really expensive lesson.

Sunday, May 21, 2006

Fish

Give a man a fish, feed him for a day.
Teach a man to fish, feed him for a lifetime.
Feed a man to a fish, and he will die.

Friday, May 19, 2006

Mr. Tuttle AND Mr. Dewey

In retrospect, Saved By The Bell: The College Years should have been called Saved By The Bell: The College Year since it only lasted one season.

And on that same note, who do you prefer? Hot Sundae or Zack Attack? "I'm So Excited" or "Friends Forever"? That is tough. Although Hot Sundae brought us classic Jessie "high" on caffeine pills, you can't really beat the up and down saga that is the Zack Attack story. Friends forever indeed.

Friday, May 05, 2006

Fire Alarm

There is a fire alarm lever I pass multiple times a day in the Aerospace Building. It just sits there. Never gets used. Just sitting there. Resting on the wall with the understanding that you can't pull it.

I swear, one day I will not be able to take it anymore, and I will pull that freggin alarm.

Monday, May 01, 2006

Laundry And Quarters And Birds

Last night, I decided to kill two birds with one stone. After I didn't find any birds, I decided to take the trash out and transfer some laundry into the drier in only one single trip. So due to that, I had 2 quarters in one hand and a huge sack of poop filled baby diapers in the other. I decided to do the trash first. So I walked to the dumpster, and wouldn't you know it, I almost threw in the quarters instead of the diapers! I then thought to myself about how it is funny that sometimes you do the wrong thing with the wrong hand and get all mixed up or whatever, and I called myself an idiot. But then I decided it would have been a lot worse if I had gone to do the laundry first and tried to put the dirty diaper sack in a coin slot. So I guess everything was ok.