Favorites

My favorite bird name is the whooping crane. My favorite bird, however, is the golden eagle.

Pockets

The best thing about cold weather is the extra pockets. In hot weather, my keys, phone, Ipod, chapstick, spare change, and whatever else gets shoved into my two measely shorts pockets. But cold weather is like a Pocket Wonderland with the bonus jacket compartments. October should be renamed Pocketober.

About Me - Envelopes

I like to push the envelope. I also like to pull the parcel. The post office just wishes I would carry both of them out of their facility in a normal manner and not make such a scene.

Let Them Eat Cake

I just saw a commercial for a period movie called Marie Antoinette, and at the end, the voice over dude said, "Based on a true story." No crap. Man, things are really getting ridiculous around here. The sad thing is that there are probably a good number of people who say, "Oh really?" at the end of that commercial instead of "How stupid do you think I am?"

Luck Of The Irish

I was on the bus the other week, an older guy with a thick Irish accent started talking to a younger American dude. I could tell from the start the American was a bit of a tool. So they were chatting, and the Irish guy said his daughter was at school in Norfolk. The younger American dude asked where that was, which to me is pretty close to being a dumb question right there. The Irish guy said, "Virginia." And then the moron from Alabama said, "Oh, is that where you are from originally?" I was sitting in front of them, and my jaw just dropped. That truly is one of the top 7 or so dumbest questions I have ever heard. It's the sort of thing that you see in movies and kind of roll your eyes because people aren't that dumb in real life. The Irish man was a bit taken aback, and he said,"Uh, no. I'm from Ireland." And the young American moron said, "Oh." I can understand messing up and wondering if he was from Scotland, or England, or even any European locale if the American just wasn't all that with it. But Virginia? Did he really think that Virginians had that sort of accent? There is no excuse for that one.